Hey, this is Rajiv Kumar Luv Trainer, Coach, Workshop leader, Author, podcaster, Youtuber and founder of The Personality Boss which conducts the Ultimate Personality Development Program, Course, Coaching, Training and Workshops in Mumbai. I help you design the life you want. The articles that I post on my blog also have one purpose in mind “Leadership through Personality Development” Now over to the article…
I love driving and you would agree with me that when you drive you need to keep your eyes in the front not at the back, so most of the time you see through the windscreen not the rear mirror. Also you can’t be looking back and walk in the forward direction, you are bound to bang into something or fall. This lesson can be applied to many situations in real life. There are some things you should never look back at. Here are 5 such things
1. Failures
If someone tells you that he or she has never failed in their life, you can be assured that they have never done anything worthwhile in their life. Because you fail only when you do something challenging. Whenever you fail you learn something, take the learning, change your approach and move on. Don’t keep looking back at your failures and keep saying, “Oh my god, I failed, I knew I will fail, I can’t do this. Stop running pictures of your failure over and over in your head. Adopt a new belief, "Failures are nothing but learning experience” Even the small child in his attempt to walk, keeps falling over and over again. But it never looks back on the number of times it has failed, it just keeps going on. Don’t you think we adults can learn this lesson from a child?
2. Lost Relationships
I was doing business with a very close relative of mine, we were like good friends, we complemented each other very well, our coordinationg was extraordinary, we made a good team. Then slowly trust went for a toss, communication was bare minimum, we reached a point where we could not stand each other. I realized that it was time to part ways. The parting was not pleasant. I felt I was given a raw deal. I had put in 9 years of my prime youth in the business and now I was on the road. I felt it was the end of life for me. I couldn’t get over this void that the broken relationship had created. Then one day, I faced the reality and had a talk with myself. I said, “Rajiv the relationship is over, move on” Do you want to keep brooding over this or do you want to do something for yourself and your family? The answer I got was, “ I want to do something, I want to show this person that even without his support I can be a success. From that day onwards, I stopped looking back at the lost relationship and did myself and my family a great favor.
3. Material Loss
I used to regularly go an Institute to take sessions on Personality Development. These sessions happened in the evening from 7pm to 9pm. My house was about 23 kms from the Institute and I would travel on my favourite Kinetic Honda Scooter. It was the rainy season. One day, I left from home and half way through it started raining cats and dogs, I stopped on the highway and put on my two-piece raincoat, the traffic was moving at snail’s pace, I was very particular about reaching my class on time, so I was dreading being late. By the time I reached the Institute’s parking area there were a few minutes left, I quickly removed my raincoat and put it in the storage compartment and ran to my class, happy that I reached in the nick of time. I had a good session with the class, then said good night to my students and started walking towards my scooter. To my utter shock, there was no scooter, it was only then I realized that when I had parked the scooter, I forgot to take the keys with me, I left the keys hanging in the ignition. I went to the police station close by and registered a complaint. I took an autorickshaw back home and told my story to my wife. She was more upset about the loss but surprisingly I was pretty cool about it and I decided I will not dwell upon it. When someone would talk about it, I would just reply, “maybe god’s wants me to buy a car now” We are going to lose material things at some point in our life which could be a mobile phone, a camera, a house or something that is very dear to us, it doesn’t make sense looking back and being immobilized by it.
4. Lost job
Though I was making a decent living from conducting sessions on Personality Development I had this desire of having a full time job. One day I came across and advertisement in the newspaper for a ‘Training Manager’ and I strongly felt that I was the right person for this job and I should get it.I sent my resume and waited, some months went by and nothing happened and then I received a call from one of my students, a girl. She was excited and told me how my course helped her and that she had got a job and when I asked her about the job, guess what, she got the job that I was waiting for and was sure of getting. Though I was happy for her, I was still upset with the company for not giving me the job. Months later, I made an agreement with another Institute on a profit sharing basis and I made 10 times more than what that job would have given me and that too working just 2 hours in the evening! So I think a better belief to adopt is, “ If I lose a job, it means something better is coming my way” So stop looking back on a lost job.
5. Lost opportunity
Many a times we come across a good opportunity which we fail to recognize and only much later we realize what we have lost and keep regretting and cursing ourselves for not grabbing the opportunity. As the old saying goes, ‘why cry over spilt milk’ So if you have lost an opportunity stop focusing on it instead become more aware in recognizing the next great opportunity and being prepared to take timely action.
I am Rajiv Kumar Luv. My passion in life is to make a difference in the lives of people so that they achieve their personal as well as professional best. I am absolutely committed to specially helping youngsters become leaders in their chosen fields. In the past 28 years, I have trained over 100,000 people from all walks of life. Through my two-day program “Leadership Through Personality Development” I help the youth plan their career, build confidence, make better decisions, manage time and develop their employability skills to meet today’s real-life challenges. You can learn more about me and the work I do by visiting: http://www.thepersonalityboss.com